PART TWO: BE FIERCE AND WORTH FOLLOWING – BOLD WORDS

 

Welcome to part two of our three-part-series of Be Fierce and Worth Following. Today’s topic is bold words. We are going to dive deep into learning how to master boldness, and the two audiences you must pay special attention to when using these prominent words.   

First, let’s do a quick recap of part one of Be Fierce and Worth Following – Having a Positive Mental Spirit. In case you missed it, here’s what we discussed:

  • Your messaging: proactively and positively positive (channeling our inner Mary Poppins!)
  • Your tribe: elevating your average by spending time with more ambitious people

And don’t forget the tattoo I plan to get this bikini season courtesy of Marie Forleo: “everything is figure-outable.”

ATTENTION! Before we go ANY further, you HAVE to grab out new, free resource if you haven’t already. It’s titled 50 Fierce Women to Follow and it’s essential!  

Part two is all about using BOLD words and how we use them, which boils down to three simple (but not easy) strategies:

  1. Talk straight
  2. Declare your intent
  3. Ask

STRATEGY #1: Talk Straight

Say you turn to your co-worker and rattle off something along the lines of…

“I woke up early this morning, did a great Peloton workout, only fixed myself a ½ bagel and left off the cream cheese, got to the office by 8 a.m., have been in back-to-back meetings, and am now looking at my afternoon schedule. I know I am going to need some energy to make it through because right after work I’ve got to grab my kid from soccer practice and finish her science fair project with her tonight.  So, I was thinking…want to go to lunch?”

Instead, you could have just said…

“I’m hungry – let’s eat!”

Women struggle from detailitis, the disease where they feel compelled to go into great detail when really just a simple sentence would suffice.

Being bold means talking straight: use fewer words with more impact. When presenting, write out your script and cut 50% or more of the words out. Look for symptoms of detailitis like:

  • Filler words (i.e. to that end, so, this brings me to)
  • Extra adjectives and adverbs (use these sparingly to punch up your message)
    • HINT:  Especially important when talking to MEN (who don’t understand nuance or prefer details) and LEADERS.

The higher the level of the person you are talking to, the less detail needed.  They will drill down and ask more questions if they need to.

STRATEGY #2:  Declare Your Intent

This concept comes from Stephen MR Covey’s book Leading at the Speed of Trust where he explains:

“One of the biggest barriers to creating a caring connection is the crossed wires of communication. We can get past many missed opportunities by simply declaring our own intention.”

Declare your intent when starting conversations, kicking off meetings, requesting a meeting with another person, talking to your spouse about a sensitive topic, and so on.

Here are examples of starting off my declaring your intent:

“My intent for this conversation is to be part of the solution.”

“My intent is to improve our communication.”

“My intent is for us both to win.”

“Can you come in at 7:30 a.m. tomorrow? I’d like to celebrate your recent project.”

By declaring your intent, you break down those communication barriers and put the other person at ease by knowing WHAT you want and WHY you want it.

Thrive-Her coach Tricia Dempsey states that this strategy is the single most effective technique she’s learned in her entire career!

STRATEGY #3 – Ask

And finally, ask for what you want while being direct, being brief, and being clear. Here’s what a bold ask looks like:

“I want your business”

“I want a promotion”

“I want help”

“I want Zoe’s Kitchen for lunch”

Women are guilty of not asking for what they want, need or dream of.  We fear rejection, disappointing others and, most of all, we fear imposter syndrome (the fear that someone knows we don’t know what they think we know, ya know?).

To use this strategy along with declaring your intent, here are several examples:

“My intent is to earn your trust and take excellent care of you. I want your business.”

“My intent is to make a greater impact on the organization and our clients.  I want a promotion to the next level”

“My intent is to finish this project on time and under budget.  I need your help.”

“My intent is to have enough food in my belly to be productive this afternoon.  I want Zoe’s kitchen for lunch.”

You get the idea.  

PRACTICE:  Starting today, before each meeting, write down two things:

  1. Your intent – this should be written in a positive benefit for the other people in the meeting
  2. Your ask – what do you need of each participant.  
  3. If you got the extra mile, you will send an agenda ahead of your meeting and a summary afterwards.

These two strategies are sure to increase communication, productivity and most of all, your personal brand impression and visibility.  #Score!

Start using these three strategies today to become bold.  And remember, being bold is a discipline developed by talking straight, declaring your intent and being clear about your ask.  

DON’T FORGET:  Grab our new free resource:  50 Fierce Women to Follow before you go any further to follow women who live by their bold words and actions.  

Now, we leave you with this shining example of BOLD WORDS in action by Rosa Parks.

 

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Want to live your purpose and create a thriving career or business you love? Need more support and accountability to make it all happen? Hire Tricia as your coach: www.thrive-her.com/4sessions

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